Monday's memories

Ah, today.  It could be remembered by the 3 potty training accidents, 2 diaper blow-outs, or the partially-digested toddler sock that Justin discovered the dog had left in the laundry room.  Eyes that fought to close, a baby with a bellyache who just wanted to be held, the difficult-to-do-with-a-baby-strapped on chores, the sinking feeling that all of last week's hard work was already undone.

When my phone buzzed with Justin's 7 pm "leaving now" text, I chuckled to myself that it was the only extra piece I needed to fulfill that country song: "Dog's barkin', phone's ringin', One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin.'"

Both girls are now sweetly slumbering (having resolved the baby bellyache and toddler frustration at having to  put her books on the shelf before bedtime), and I finally had two hands to fold some laundry, changed into my favorite (now clean) pajamas, and read a few blogs.  One of my favorite bloggers, Kathryn at Team Whitaker, is hosting a "Week in My Life 2014" link-up, so I decided to jump on board and reflect on my day (and maybe some other days...we'll see how the week goes!)

I could go the play-by-play route, including the aforementioned frustrations, but I know that's not what I want to memorialize.

It's these, these moments.

Of sisterly love.

Of sharing the excitement of holiday celebrations.
(you wish you got to wear a turkey hat to work)

Of delighting at having a helper (and getting to "do it mineself").
Of enjoying a beautiful sunny day without coats in November (!) and appreciating nature and feeding the birdies.

 Of little conversations and hearing a growing creative imagination:

"Dis an egg, and dis a birfday cake!"
"Who's birthday is it?"
"It's you's birthday!  Happy birfday, mommy dear!" (singing)

(The third rock was deemed applesauce, my birthday came and went and we celebrated a collective birthday of Pop/Uncle/Mumsie, she cut the cake with her finger (which she called a knife but operated like scissors), and then the egg/birthday cake/applesauce turned into presents, wrapped with the free address label stickers I had just gotten out of the mailbox).

It's that toddler dialogue, the funny mispronunciations, the bright eyes discovering the world, that bring so much joy to my days.

It's those moments, the ones that are the reason that the chorus of that aforementioned barkin'/cryin' country song is as follows:

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These Are Some Good Times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Miss it, yes.  And sadly, forget it, too (at least in the vivid details I wish I could retain).  The specific details of each little toddler comment are already fading (I really wish I could remember what she was telling Julia this morning in that first picture!)  Thanks, Kathryn, for the inspiration to make a little time capsule this week :)

Check out more Week in My Their Life here.

Julie's Catholic!

Praise to the Lord, O let all that is in me adore Him

All that hath life and breath

Come now with praises before Him

Let the 'amen' sound from His people again

Gladly for aye we adore Him

How wonderful it was to join in singing the opening hymn at today's Mass, with words expressing the joy that has been overflowing in my heart.

We had a wonderful weekend celebrating Julia's baptism, and I'm so thankful for the wonderful people who made long trips to be with us!

Fabulous God-parents

Fabulous family.

 Anna narrated most of the ceremony with "Doolia's Baptism!  Fodder pour water on the head!" (on repeat).  When we asked her after what the Deacon had done for Julia, she said "splashed her!"  Her enthusiasm, however, was spent well before it was time for any pictures:

Welcome to the Church, sweet girl!  As a friend wrote in your card: "It's a wonderful place to be!"  Amen, and Alleluia.

For Anna's Baptism photos and more about their gown (cut from the train of my wedding dress), see HERE.  (Note that the post is about celebrating her first Baptismal Anniversary; the second anniversary celebration definitely fell off the radar last month!)

More pictures!

I've found myself in the past few days putting off posting anything on the blog because I all at once have a million things I want to write, and yet nothing that seems worth writing.  I have good news, bad news, musings on life with two kids, my typical over-analysis of all things on the home front, etc.  I finally decided tonight to just bite the bullet and post something over more nothing - guessing that my favorite pictures from my Julia folder would be the biggest crowd pleaser ;)

A little wedding-ring photo to commemorate our anniversary baby!

This moment - introducing Anna to her sister - is one of the most highly anticipated, exciting moments of my life.

Anna's face in this picture makes me laugh every time (and so does Julie's hair!)
This scowl definitely does not accurately represent Anna's feelings about being a big sister (see below...)

First photo as a family of four!

Sister love!

 We welcomed Julia Mae at 11:18 pm on October 9, 2014.  I had been feeling as though labor was imminent for at least three weeks prior, and both my mom and Justin had stopped believing me when I said that contractions were picking up (and honestly, I had, too) since we had so many false alarms.  I woke up on the 9th (our fourth wedding anniversary) emotionally and physically drained.  I was sick of the exhaustion, the pain, the uncertainty, the contractions, the discomfort.  I wanted to focus on the good - the fact that I was blessed with a healthy (albeit very uncomfortable) pregnancy and a healthy little girl - but the hormones and the exhaustion got the best of me and I was just a sobbing emotional wreck.  (Definitely what every guy wants his wife to be on their anniversary).

Thankfully, my wonderful mom was still here and pep-talked me (as well as a "It's going to be OK" and reassurance of her prayers over the phone from my grandmother) to the point that I mostly got myself together.  I managed to clean our bathroom, which I had been putting off for days (mostly because I was mad that labor had not yet started in enough time for the bathroom to get dirty again after my previous "last-before-labor" cleaning).

I had a doctor's appointment at 1:30, and my wise mama suggested that I meet Justin for Mass on campus at noon as a little anniversary thanksgiving/celebration and for the attitude adjustment that some good prayer time will always provide.  I was uncomfortable and had tears slowly rolling down my cheeks for a lot of Mass, but I was thankful we had the opportunity to go together.

Since I was past my due date, I had been having ultrasounds and non-stress tests to make sure Julia was still healthy and that the placenta was still providing adequate support.  The ultrasound went really well and the sweet technician got a few good 3-D shots of Julie's face, which were slight consolation for not seeing her in person.  We moved down the hall for a non-stress test.  If you're not familiar, it's kinda what it sounds like - the least stressful possible test.  You sit in an easy chair with two monitors strapped to your belly, checking for contractions/fetal movement and for the baby's heartbeat.  They want to see that the baby's heartbeat accelerates in response to their movement (just like our heart rate would go up after running up the stairs).

For two data nerds like ourselves, watching the graphical printouts was pretty fun for Justin and I.  (In fact, at one of the first tests he took a cell phone picture of the graphs to use as an example in one of his Calculus lectures).  We understood what we were looking at and what we were looking for, in general.  I had trouble keeping the monitor in place (usually it's strapped on at the beginning of the test and I'd have to move it once or twice if she moved enough that it wasn't picking up her heart), and eventually I gave up trying to get it on correctly and paged the nurse.  She took the print-outs to the doctor to read, and came back and announced promptly "You're going to labor and delivery!"

They had noticed a lot of contractions on the print-out (which I knew were happening, and wanted to think were more real than before, but didn't want to get my hopes up), and they wanted more monitoring - given that they didn't have a good read, and what they could see didn't look as great as they had hoped.

I was thankful that I had actually brought my hospital bag and things with me to the appointment - Justin had encouraged me to do so for the last few appointments since the hospital is attached to the office building, all of which is about 25 minutes from home.  I obliged grudgingly the other times (it was annoying to keep getting things out of the car that I needed) but when I left that day it seemed like it was actually a good idea, and I brought everything I needed, not just the 80% I'd been half-heartedly lugging back and forth for a few weeks.

I kept having contractions as we walked through to the hospital, registered, went up to the floor, and began the monitoring.  Some of the nurses who had assisted during my false alarm a few weeks prior said "are you finally having that baby!?" and I told them I wasn't holding my breath.  I kept comparing things to my labor with Anna, which kicked off (and maintained) with a ton of nausea, so it didn't seem that a baby was imminent, especially since I had eaten lunch.

This was going to be my "brief" birth story, which is already much longer than I anticipated....and we're not even sure I'm in labor yet.  Whoops...I'll gloss over some of the additional details (especially the actual labor details!)

We spent the next few hours being monitored, chatting (it was actually more quiet down-time than we've had in a long time, so even if it was peppered with moderate contractions, it wasn't a terrible way to spend our anniversary), praying the Rosary, watching some TV.  I kept thinking this couldn't possibly be labor because I was able to do all of the above things...and I wasn't sick.

Eventually, I was checked and I was barely more progressed than I had been at my previous several weeks' appointments (but - progress! - as I had been holding steady for a looooong time).  The midwife came and talked to us and said that she wanted to move things along - although Julia's heart rate was still accelerating a little bit, it wasn't reacting to her movement as strongly as they'd hoped, and they wanted to encourage her on her way before it got to the point where it was not reacting (or - worse, reacting negatively) and delivery was more urgent.  We decided that I would walk the halls for a little while as one final natural effort to progress, and then we'd reevaluate in about an hour.  Either way, they decided I was definitely staying, and hooked up the IV (for antibiotics and fluid) and declared me officially in labor.  (I had an incredibly crazy (ironic?) amount of relief to know that I was about to start something so physically demanding!)

I was checked again after the walk - a little more progress!, but still not enough to continue without some help.  We chose the breaking of water over Pitocin, and that was done at 9:15 pm.  Things immediately got more intense (as I had expected, based on my experience with Anna).  They wanted me in bed for more monitoring, which I did for a while until I buzzed the nurse and said I had to get up.  I used the bathroom, ended up spending a significant amount of time with my head on my arms bent over the sink, unable to get back across the room because of the intensity and frequency of the contractions.  Eventually they coaxed me back over so that they could monitor the baby's heart rate again.  I thought I might be close to complete, the nurse checked and said I was almost there but not quite (I think I let out a pathetic yet emphatic NOOOOOOOO when she told me).  I managed to make it through the next several minutes as the midwife came in and got ready.

I told them that I thought I might be ready to push - but I wasn't completely sure.  They said I could bear down if it felt right.  I followed instructions, and all of a sudden the midwife said "she's beautiful."  I thought to myself, "what, the top of her head?"  I was thinking back to the multiple hours of pushing with Anna, expecting there was no way they could see more than a few hairs at this early stage.  Then Justin said, "Em, she's beautiful!" and I realized that he wouldn't/couldn't say that if he wasn't seeing a significant portion of our baby that he could recognize.  I was suddenly able to put together what they were saying with what I was feeling, and realized that I had delivered her head.  Another contraction came and I pushed once more and delivered her body.

She cried; they handed her to me; the euphoria of her healthy arrival and the end of the labor and the end of the pregnancy began.  I asked Justin "is it today or tomorrow?" and he told me that it was "today" - meaning, still our anniversary.  It was 11:18, only 2 hours and a few minutes since they had broken my water and the labor really began.

For whatever reason, I felt so much more aware and engaged during this point than I was with Anna.  I remember more vivid details (in a good way) of Julia's delivery - beyond what I've shared here - and I can recall the immediate post-delivery, which I really can't with Anna.  This time, I could just peacefully hold my baby (Anna had to be checked right away because of a few warning signs that ended up being nothing).  The midwife quickly delivered the placenta and they covered us up with some blankets and the whole medical staff left us along for more than an hour to spend time as a family.

I am so incredibly thankful for the beautiful gift of this little girl, for what my body was designed to do, for the medical staff who assisted.  I am also incredibly thankful that I was given (perhaps as consolation for a painful pregnancy) a quick and relatively easy delivery (I wouldn't have agreed with "easy" when I was standing at the bathroom sink moaning about how badly it hurt and how much I wanted it to be over...but still) and for a really easy recovery.  From the minute of her birth, my pain and discomfort has been less than 5% of what I had for months prior.

Now that we're home and settling into routine, I feel fantastic.  Sure, life with two littles is tiring, but it's different.  I've always been really good at sleep deprivation; extreme physical exhaustion like the last few weeks before she was born, not as much.  I am so thankful to be able to pick up Anna easily, to be able to roll over in bed without stabbing pain, to be able to walk up and down the stairs.  I think I've realized even more how poorly I felt now that I have the comparison of feeling good.  We'll see if she (like her sister) lapses into an impossible-to-put-down phase, but for now Julia has been a wonderfully easy baby.

Joy.  So much joy.  And fulfillment in feeling that this - this mommy thing - is what I was meant to do.

We love you, Julie Mae, and we thank God for you every day!

I'll be ready if she likes crafting...

So, assuming Julia's into crafting (she's my daughter, of course she will be!) then I'm ready for her to arrive.  Granted, not a single stitch of her clothing or Anna's clothing (or any of their bedding/towels/accessories/etc) is in a drawer - BUT my little haven of a sewing room/office is all set up (including these new fabric-covered cans to hold my art supplies).

It's not misplaced priorities, I swear ;)

I did manage to get a decent amount of organizing done on Friday (at least all of our clean laundry is put away, which comes with the dual benefit of not having to move multiple full laundry baskets to get to my closet and of no longer waking up to "Hey Em, do I have any gray socks?" at least for a few days).

Yesterday, I had one of "those" days that come with the 9-month of pregnancy - I think the most productive thing I did all day was take a shower, although my sweet husband did remind me several times that I was growing a human, which I suppose is rather productive.  It seems like Julia dropped further down in my belly, which means even more pressure on already very stressed ligaments/bones/veins/etc.  All of the pain / non-productivity of the day really fed the fire of the mind game that comes at the end of pregnancy....will labor start in 3 hours?  3 days?  3 weeks?  It literally could be any time from now to sometime in October, and that starts to get to you after a while, I think, especially if you're a planner!  Should I rush around and freeze some more meals?  Or can that wait until next week?  Will she be healthy?  How will the labor go?  Will we have to scramble when Justin's at work, or will it conveniently be after my mom has arrived to help?  So many questions when you're lying on the couch unable to even roll over for the pain.

Justin got up this morning and took Anna to 8 AM Mass so that I could sleep in, and going to Mass alone at 11 gave me the much needed push of the refresh button in terms of attitude and a sense of fortitude (not self-given, for sure!) to make it through both these last few weeks (days?  weeks?) of pregnancy and the crazy postpartum days.  Thankfully the pain is more manageable this afternoon, too, so I've been able to move about more freely.

We got a lot of things checked off the prepare-for-baby checklist, most importantly essentials like finding, cleaning, and installing the car seat.  We were additionally inspired to get things ready already when we heard the news this morning that some friends from Ithaca (due only 5 days before me) welcomed their son this morning (congratulations, Drew and Maria!)  Justin brought up the remainder of the baby storage bins, so at least everything we need is in Anna's room, even if it's not 100% organized yet.  I found my duffel bag to pack for the hospital and at least started thinking about what needs to go in it - getting sidetracked by a sewing project to add some length to the tunic I plan to wear home from the hospital (I put a ridiculous amount of analysis into determining the optimal coming-home outfit after my flounder as a 1st time mom wearing a still-too-tight and not-easy-to-nurse-in dress).  Again, priorities ;)

And, as I said...my sewing/craft/office space is now completely organized and functional.  While this probably doesn't seem as exciting to anyone else, it really is helpful for me to have a space that allows me to easily do the things I need and love to do (pay bills and sew things, respectively).  After setting things up here, I realized how scattered my things were at home in Ithaca.  If I wanted to make and mail someone a gift, for example, I would go to Anna's closet (trying not to wake her up) for sewing supplies, back to our room to sew, back to her closet for markers or cards/stationery, downstairs to the den for the envelopes and postage meter, into the kitchen for my address book, and the living room for stamps.  It made sense to store each of the things where they were, but it resulted in a wild goose chase to get things done.  Oh, and I didn't have a set place to store or use my computer, let alone office supplies.  Now everything is in one room and I'm already noticing how efficient I can be, and therefore how much more of the things I enjoy (mailing cards/letters, sewing things, doing little projects with Anna) can be completed.  (At least theoretically!)

It's not quite Pinterest-worthy, especially since it's just a temporary space and I didn't do anything permanent to the walls (the dolphins came with the territory, and I don't want to put any nail holes up anywhere) but it really is an exciting and relaxing (and did I mention FUNCTIONAL!) space for me!

You can catch a glimpse of the finished tunic dress on the door - it is literally the only item of clothing that I have worn at both 0 months and 9 months pregnant, so it's clearly the optimal choice for immediately postpartum!  (Plus it's comfortable!  Plus it's easy for nursing!)

(Hopefully) I'll have some pictures to share (soon!) of the other upstairs rooms.  We're getting there :)  And if nothing else, Julia and I will just do a lot of sewing... ;)


P.S. Yes, I do have 3 sewing machines (two regular and a serger).  I use them all for different things (and can do so much easier now that the other two don't have to balance on the ledge of the footboard on our bed while in use!)

Game changers

Apparently I'm on a blogging kick recently...but no promises once the baby comes!!  :)

A few random thoughts from this evening:

I FINALLY got my hair cut (by a professional, although Anna did offer "Anna cut it." as I was on my way out the door).  I realized that the last time I remembered to have it cut was November...partly because it was a busy year and I guess I just didn't think about it, and partly because I was on my Downton Abbey kick and imagined that I would grow it out and have all of these beautiful up-dos.  But really, I just grew it out and had lots of half-hearted messy buns.

But no longer!

(Yes, huge belly is still there, just not pictured.  If you need a visual on the bump or the messy "before" hair, check out the last post).

So it's amazing how much better I feel to have a legitimate hair-do (and one I'll actually keep up with since it can now be blown dry in under 5 minutes).  Somebody remind me in 2 months to just go get it cut!  Every time I've gone through a let's-try-long-hair phase, I end up hating all of the pictures of that period in retrospect.  

Now I just need to find someone to paint the toenails I can no longer reach, and I'll be all pampered and pretty and ready to welcome Miss Julia.

The house...is not pampered and pretty.  I didn't get nearly as much done this week as I hoped, BUT I'm cutting myself slack because I managed to catch a cold.  I joked/complained to my doctor at my appointment today that I was more of a wimp with an unmedicated cold than my unmedicated childbirth, and then she told me that I was actually allowed to take nasal decongestant spray.  !!!!  Between that and the haircut I feel like a totally new woman.  Maybe even one who's ready to conquer all the clean-up tomorrow.  Somehow, my love of folding laundry does not translate to a love of putting laundry away...we've got at least 4 basket of clean, folded laundry that needs to go into drawers.  And a whole bin of baby clothes, which have now at least made it from the basement to the first floor!  And every article of clothing Anna owns is strewn around her room because a) I haven't decided where I'm storing it yet and b) she has taken that as her cue to repeatedly change outfits all day long (with large stretches of toddler nudity for good measure).  Maybe by the end of the weekend I can give you some actual "after" photos of the space we're living, instead of just silly hair-cut afters :)

Let's see, other game changers...when I was looking through my photo files this evening, I realized what a difference it has made to have a good camera.  The pictures are so much better quality, and I end up having more because I feel that it's worth the time to take it out and take some shots since they turn out decently.  Here's a few recent favorites (enjoy, Mom!)  I also just ordered a "nifty fifty" lens, which has gotten rave reviews for taking newborn photos and pictures of kids in general.  Stay tuned.

Enough rambling for one day.  Goodnight!

Oh, except for those of you who aren't on Facebook didn't see this gem that I found while reviewing my August pictures:

Big, Bigger, Biggest: Beds, Bumps, and Progress

Can anyone think of a synonym for "progress" that starts with B?  It would have made this post title that much more catchy.....

(Esoteric side note - Kathy, do you remember how long it took us to come up with "Rooms and Routes" for the cards in my wedding invitations to match "Reception" and "RSVP?")


Anyway, this weekend saw a lot of BIG things happening.  Primarily, we can thank Justin's mom and her excellent Anna care - Justin and I forgot how much we can accomplish when not simultaneously chasing a toddler!


The first big thing - Anna got a big girl bed!  We were planning to keep her in the crib for a while longer (using the pack & play bassinet for Julia at first) but then she started attempting to c-l-i-m-b out, and I was afraid of her falling.  Our hosts have a toddler bed, and we started talking up how exciting it would be to use that when we moved upstairs.  Then, Gigi (Justin's mom!) found an amazing deal on a toddler bed at a yard sale, and besides the great price, it also matches our crib for future sister room-sharing coordination, so we were pretty excited about that find!  Anna spent a lot of today saying "Gigi brought present!  Big dirl bed!  Anna big dirl bed!  Happy birfday Anna!"

I made her crib sheets (using this tutorial as a starting point and also putting elastic at the bottom of the flat sheet, as per my wise friend Deanne's recommendations).  I will note that Anna picked the fabric entirely on her own.  She was in the stroller at Jo-Anns and when I pulled up to the clearance fabric section she pointed at this one and said "Anna!  blankets!  Anna!"  I had told her we were going to buy sheets on that outing, but I had the pre-made department store type in mind.  I was pretty impressed at her shopping - she not only found fabric that matched her existing quilt perfectly, it was on sale for $4 a yard, and she was smart enough to tell me that homemade would be better :)  In true last-minute fashion, I was still adding the elastic while Justin gave her a bath, and she was already getting her pajamas on when I selected the scrap of fabric for the pillow case (anything for a photo shoot, you know!) and quickly sewed that together in time for her to run in and see the bed all made up.

She was more than a little bit excited.

She's now soundly asleep in her bed.  There were moments during the falling asleep process that made me consider starting Julia in a toddler bed so we never have to do the crib to bed transition (kidding!!) but overall it went pretty well.  Her whole nighttime routine has been pretty inconsistent with the move, so now that we're getting settled upstairs, I'm hopeful that it will be a relatively smooth transition.


On to other big things: let's talk about the belly.  I haven't posted a bump shot in a long time, and finally remembered to get Justin to take one tonight.

I mostly wanted to have a side-by-side comparison because I'm convinced I'm much smaller this time around, but it's hard to tell comparing a picture to me looking in the mirror.

The picture above (from tonight) is 36 weeks, 4 days.  Here's one from the last go-round, at 35 weeks, 0 days:

Maybe it's not visually obvious, but I do feel like the bump is smaller.  Objectively, it is at least a little smaller, as Anna always measured two or three weeks ahead at my appointments, and Julia has been right on.  According to the scale, I'm about the same weight, but I know from the way that certain items fit (or didn't fit in Anna's case) that I'm definitely smaller.  Maybe I have more muscle this time?  Or my brain got bigger?  ;)  Also - I still have my rings on!  I'm super excited about this fact, and hoping that I can keep the swelling down enough to leave them on until the end.  With Anna, I switched to a cheapo Target ring (you know, because of the potential scandal of having a big belly and no ring, haha) which fit my ring finger snugly during my last 6 ish weeks with her and later fit on my thumb after pregnancy.  I COMPLETELY forgot to type it in my last post, but the air conditioning here has been one of the most amazing perks for which I am most grateful, and probably why I'm not the blimp I was at this stage with Anna.

Anyone want to take some guesses on weight and date for the birth?  For comparison sake, Anna was due August 30, born September 3 and weighed 9 lbs 13 oz.  I'm due this time on October 1.  I'm obviously thinking (hoping?) Julia will be smaller - so much so that I went and bought some newborn-sized outfits yesterday.  (Anna came home from the hospital in one that was size 3 months; since we knew in advance she was going to be a big girl, we only had 1 newborn outfit that fit her for about 2 days).  Oh, and people have commented that I'm still carrying pretty high up - don't be fooled.  Without my (life-saving, incredible) belly band on, the belly sags much lower!  Feel free to enter your guesses for weight and date in the comments and enter to win the grand prize of bragging rights if you're the closest :)


Final big news around here:  progress!  I feel like I can now see the light at the end of the home set-up tunnel, and the thought of potentially early labor no longer makes me panic.  I feel like by the end of this week, I can be to the point where my main to-do item can be spending time with Anna and waiting for the big day :)

Things took a while because this happened:

I told you I was a crazy nesting lady.

Every time we saw the room that we're using as our master bedroom, our hosts would apologize profusely for the paint, and I would laugh and reassure them that it was the same color I picked for our old bedroom.  They said that they didn't mind the color (although it was a bit darker than they would have liked) but that the paint itself hadn't been done well by the previous owners.  I didn't really notice until we moved some of the furniture and then I realized that I agreed - the paint must have been the world's cheapest paint possible because everywhere someone had ever looked at it, it had a smudge (not really, but every where someone touched it wouldn't be an exaggeration).  So, off I went to Lowe's and set off on painting that room (a slightly lighter shade of the existing color), the two closets, and the attached bath.  And then, since I was on a roll, I also painted Anna's room - I went with the same color it already was, just a fresh coat to cover all of the natural consequences of walls that house 2 boys!  I finished painting yesterday, and also finished almost of the items on my ridiculous cleaning to-do list (let's blame nesting again....obviously a newborn is going to care if I've dusted each individual slat on all the blinds, right??)  So, yes, big progress!  I'll post some pictures of our rooms soon, once I do a day or two more worth of work to finally put Anna's clothes in drawers, remove some empty cardboard boxes, etc.

So, that's all, folks.  What's big in your lives this weekend?

With gratitude

So after all the ice buckets, it seems like the next big thing on Facebook is to challenge friends to do a little "count your blessings" exercise, listing 3 things for which you're thankful everyday for 5 days.  When I was challenged, I felt a little awkward about posting it on Facebook, but it somehow feels different to do it here (you all knew this site was going to be very Emily-centric when you clicked on over, but you didn't necessarily bargain for that in your newsfeed).  I'm going to morph the rules a bit and write a gratitude post of 15 things, rather than 5 different Facebook updates.

Incidentally, I was having a rough morning when I decided that I should do this.  It was one of those days when I seemed to wake up with less energy than I went to sleep with, and I couldn't help but look down at my ticking time-bomb of a belly and wonder how in the world I'd ever get things settled before the baby makes her arrival.  (Side note, I was further progressed at my 36 week check-up yesterday than I was at 39 weeks with Anna.  This probably doesn't mean anything besides this isn't my first baby....but the knowledge that I'm already beginning to move towards delivery isn't exactly comforting when absolutely nothing is ready!)

Anyway, I thought about the challenge, and started to wonder if I would participate by listing my blessings.  This was before I decided to do a blog post, so it was mostly a thought experiment since I felt awkward about the whole Facebook thing.  I thought of a thing or two, and suddenly I had a flood of ideas.  And with the ideas, true gratitude and a brand-new wave of energy and enthusiasm.  It was such a cliche moment, but I started to realize that all of the things that were stressing me out were minor side effects to major blessings - blessings that many people would love to have.

We can all check the news and give a sort of superficial "oh, I'm so thankful for my nice life" but until you actually make yourself stop and think - but for the grace of God, there am I - it's hard to acknowledge that we COULD be the ones stranded on a mountain and being persecuted, or the ones dying of incurable diseases, or the ones struggling to decide between payments life-saving drugs or food for the family.

There are obviously so many more blessings in my life than could fit in a 15-point list.  Some of the things (ice cream, Emily, really?) are not nearly as important as others that I left out (not being persecuted, for one), but this isn't an exhaustive list, nor is the order particularly relevant.  But one thing's for sure - it's all things I'm very glad I have, and the big - and little - joys in life that, when I remember to keep them in perspective, really turn a bad day around.

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That I have thus far been able to conceive, carry, and deliver healthy babies.  I know that the minor discomforts of pregnancy are nothing compared to the crosses of infertility and miscarriage, crosses that so many people have to carry.

(2) 

As I strive to create a comfortable and loving home, I recognize all the more what an incredible blessing it was to grow up in a home that was exactly that.  Unlike so many of our peers, my siblings and I never had to wonder if my parents loved each other or us.  And my parents are still amazing and will do things like drive 5 hours each way to spend the entire weekend running a carpet cleaner and carrying things up 2 flights of stairs.

(3)

This incredible man deserves a bullet point all of his own, but I also couldn't help but reflect on the amazing blessing of marriage in general.  Justin and I will often note how thankful we are - both that we don't have to go to the trouble of searching for someone, but also to have the security of each other's love and the knowledge that, come what may, we will be have someone by our side to weather those storms.  After discovering Marie Miller's song "6'2" in quick take posts last week, I can't stop listening to it.  It touches me with a haunting remembrance of the time of longing and of uncertainty, of wondering if my wonderful prince charming would ever come along.  (Spoiler alert, he did).

(4)

Justin often jokes that I'm solar-powered, and I am definitely very affected by the presence (or lack thereof) of sunlight.  I'm thankful for the glorious windows in this house, including a 2-story wall of windows in the living room, and this beautiful patch of sun where Anna and I get to eat lunch and watch our birdie friends dine outside.

(bonus picture - Justin would sometimes take me to the growth chamber in his lab at Cornell, which was basically a big, wonderful box of sunlight intended primarily for growing plants but also very effective for wife mood improvement on grumpy winter days)

(5)

This is one of my favorite pictures, ever.

Sometimes I just stop and reflect on how many amazing people who have come into our lives over the years.  We have some incredible family and friends, spanning childhood, high school, college, career, Ithaca, etc.  I've had the moments where I stop and think - "wow, these people really want to spend time with ME?!"  

(6)

It's hard to fathom the blessing that Jesus Christ is present - body, blood, soul, and divinity - to us in the Eucharist.  And, what a comfort to know that in every Catholic Church in the world, a little red candle burns, reminding us that there He waits in the Tabernacle.  Our new parish is right at the end of the road into our neighborhood, and so I pass it every time I drive anywhere, and I find just driving by Him to be a blessing.

(Photo from my incredible friend (see #5) Meg's site - go here to read her awesome reflections on the Eucharist, all of which have helped me to grow in my understanding and appreciation of this gift!)

(7)

Yesterday, both Anna and I had check-ups at the "dod-dors off-ice" and it reminded me how thankful I am that we have access to quality healthcare, and that we have been able to find pediatricians and OB-GYNs both here and in Ithaca that we really like.

(8)

It's been a joy to see Justin embark on a job that he loves and one where he absolutely excels.  (He'll tell you he's still just figuring out how this whole professor thing works, but I can tell that this is truly his vocation and that his gifts are perfectly aligned in this position.)  

Side note - he does not regularly drink champagne in the classroom, but this picture (from his PhD defense) is the only relevant picture I have.  Second side note / secondary benefit - I do not complain about how handsome he looks everyday all dressed up for work :)

(9)

ICE KEEM!!

My thoughts exactly, Anna.

(10)

(Of the thousands of hours I've logged, apparently this is the only photographic proof of me having ever used a computer)

It can be a distraction and a temptation to waste time, but more often than not I'm grateful for the Internet and all it does to keep me connected to family and friends - and even new friends.  Skype lessens the blow of Anna being hours away from her grandparents, and seeing even quick status updates from friends across the country makes it feel like they're not thousands of miles away.

(11)

Pictured here: my new Eucharistic devotion medal (#6) that I ordered from Etsy (#11) with the gift card that the lovely ladies  (#5) from our mom's group in Ithaca gave me as a going away present.

The ability to buy everything we need (and most of the things we want).  After a grocery trip, I'm amazed by the bounty of opening the refrigerator.  And with pregnancy + toddler + economically depressed town, I've become (more) dependent on online shopping - thank you, Amazon...and sorry, Mr. Postman.

(12)

It is so amazing to watch Anna learn and develop.  In the last month, her verbal abilities have just exploded, and having a window into her little brain has been so much fun.  She was SO excited about her second birthday this week, and it was fun to be able to celebrate with her and know that she understood what was happening (I still hear her wishing herself "Happy Birfday, Anna!" from her crib as she falls asleep at night).  Hearing her count to ten for the first time was an incredible moment.  I'm thankful both for her development, and for having a front-row seat to watch it all.

(13)

We might not have everything set-up yet, but we've already reaped a lot of benefits from the house where we're staying for this year (like this beautiful view from the front porch).  I feel like I'm living in the lap of luxury with a garage, a garbage disposal, and a master bathroom.  We might be spoiled after this year!

(14)

I have to admit that I'm easily annoyed (at least internally) by people who are (by choice rather than health) extremely picky eaters.  I'm thankful that - first of all - none of us have any food allergies, but also that Justin (and, for the most part, Anna) is an adventurous eater who honestly enjoys everything, including fish, vegetables, beans, meat, salad, etc.  It makes certainly makes cooking healthy meals a lot easier (and more fun).

(Back story about that photo - it was from the first time I made dinner (granted, it was just frozen chicken fillets and steamed broccoli with some reheated potato casserole that someone had generously brought to us) after Anna was born, and I absolutely felt on top of the world).

(15)

My creative hobbies - from sewing to home renovation - bring me a lot of enjoyment, have saved us money on things like curtains and decor (savings probably negated by my extensive stash of unfinished projects), and have resulted in a lot of neat finished products for ourselves and for gifts.  I'm grateful that my mom passed along the interest and the know-how of working with my hands.

Bonus gratitude: my awesome mother-in-law is currently visiting, so Anna will have grandma time tomorrow morning while exhausted mama and daddy sleep in and I don't have to feel guilty about how long this post took me to write and how late I (accidentally) just stayed up!

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I guess part of this thing is that I'm also supposed to nominate some people to count their blessings.  It honestly was a really worthwhile use of my time and gave me a much needed "attitude adjustment."  So - I encourage everyone to take some time and do it.  Any one else want to write a post?  My blog-friends in similarly crazy stages in life (when - I know - it's easier to lose track of this big picture)?  Mandy?  Ellen?  Rosie?  Rachel?

P.S. Thanks, Maria, for the challenge :)